New & Precious Sounds, Bright Flash Literary Review, June 2022

 

Desiree decided to leave her husband while washing dishes on a warm Thursday afternoon. The words landed inside her like a package dropped at the front door: I’m leaving. She was fifty-five, a retired school teacher with no kids of her own. People said she was reliable; people said she was trustworthy. I’m leaving. 

​

She didn’t walk out on Frank right away. Instead, she lived within her secret, relishing her veiled existence. She imagined herself as sole passenger inside a dim waiting room at a bus terminal, ticket clutched between her fingers; but where would she go?

 

As the days passed, new sounds came to her, sounds that had always been there but that she’d never noticed: her footsteps, creaking down the stairs; the teapot, ticking on the stove as it cooled; the edge in Frank’s voice, the whap of the screen door. Her heart, however, remained untouched, tucked away, deep within.  

 

Would she sneak away at midnight? Or flee in a rage? Would she race off to Paris? Rush into another man’s arms? 

 

For hours, she considered all the possible scenarios, savoring them with a reverence that was entirely new to her.  I’m leaving, I’m leaving.  

 

Frank went on his morning walks; he left for work by seven, returned by six; she cooked him dinner; they ate together, hearts emptied by meaningless conversation; he watched the news; she read a novel; they slept. All the usual things. 

 

On a Tuesday morning in late July, she woke to a tapping—so subtle she’d almost missed it. Something was caught, something alive; like a bird, batting against the walls in a dark panic. She sat up. There was no bird.  More fluttering, and she realized that it was her own heart that had woken her from sleep, a new, precious sound that she could no longer ignore.